There was a time I thought binge-watching a show until 2 AM was “taking care of myself.”
I’d say, “I need this,” as I scrolled mindlessly through reels or ordered food I didn’t even enjoy.
But the truth? I wasn’t resting. I was escaping.
And there’s a big difference.
One numbs you. The other heals you.
Rest feels like exhaling.
Escape feels like disappearing.
When I rest, I return to myself.
When I escape, I avoid myself.
That was the realization that hit me on a quiet Sunday afternoon—not during a productivity sprint or a meltdown, but during a pause. I sat with a cup of tea, no noise, no phone, just stillness. And for once, I didn’t feel the urge to run from anything.
Escape often comes dressed as comfort
It’s the extra episode even when your eyes hurt.
It’s doomscrolling even though your head feels heavy.
It’s staying “busy” to avoid what you’re really feeling.
And the thing is—it works. For a moment. It numbs the edge. But later, you still feel tired. Still feel disconnected. Still feel like you never actually caught your breath.
Rest, on the other hand, is presence
Real rest asks nothing from you.
It doesn’t distract—it grounds.
It may not give you a rush of dopamine, but it gives you something better: clarity.
Rest is reading slowly, not to finish, but to feel.
It’s walking without a podcast, just listening to your own thoughts.
It’s letting your shoulders drop and saying, “This is enough for today.”
How I started noticing the difference
One evening, I shut off my phone for an hour. No agenda. No “habit tracker.” Just silence.
At first, it was uncomfortable. My hands kept reaching for something to do.
But slowly, my mind softened. The noise inside me settled.
I wasn’t escaping anymore.
I was resting.
And that small difference changed everything.
A few questions I ask myself now
- Am I doing this to feel better—or to avoid feeling at all?
- Will I feel lighter after this—or more numb?
- Is this pulling me closer to myself—or away?
I still scroll sometimes. I still overdo it. But now, I notice. And that noticing brings choice. Choice brings freedom.
The truth is: we all need both sometimes
Some days, you need the escape. You really do. And that’s okay.
But if that becomes the only way you cope, the exhaustion lingers.
Rest is what rebuilds you.
Escape is what delays the rebuilding.
You don’t have to be perfect with it.
You just have to be honest.
Rest isn't just about stopping. It’s about returning.
Returning to your breath.
To your body.
To the part of you that’s quietly waiting to be listened to.
And when you choose that kind of rest, you don’t just recover—you come home.
